Monday, April 19, 2004

I'm burping up the not-so-subtle flavor of fish oil.

I started taking fish oil supplements just this morning to boost the amount of Omega-3 fatty acids floating around in my blood. In addition to the fish pills I've improved my eating habits significantly during the past two weeks.

On the weekends, I eat whatever the hell I want.

I mention this effort to clean out my arteries because McDonald's Chairman and CEO, Jim Cantalupo, died of an apparent heart attack this morning.

I realize Mr. Cantalupo's heart problems, more than likely, had very little to do with his affiliation with McDonald's. Regardless, I read the sad news and felt my chest tighten as I thought of all the Quarter Pounder extra value meals I've consumed over the years.

I'm guessing I go to McDonald's three times a month so I consider myself a typical McDonald's customer considering my demographic. Two of those three trips are usually because of the convenience found in having disgruntled teenagers prepare dinner for my family. Although there are those times when nothing but a Big Mac or their fries will do.

I'm pretty sure maintaining this type of allegiance to the Golden Arches has hurt my health. These days, each trip through the drive-thru feels like I'm giving in to some cabal of powerful, profit hungry executives. These people don't seem as sinister as those found in the tobacco industry. However, they still hired a clown to obscure the fact that the fries aren't good for us.

I suppose it's encouraging that Ronald's bosses are responding to the pressures of a well-informed public. Not unlike the smokeless cigarette, McDonald's is tinkering with their product line by offering adult Happy Meals.

These meals are apparently not an effort to mainstream the porn industry. They are simply a marketing ploy that targets health conscious fast food consumers.

If you order an adult Happy Meal you'll get a salad, a bottle of water and pedometer. It'll also be chock full of cutting edge fitness advice like, "Walk more."

It all seems more than a little lackadaisical considering the current onslaught of negative publicity the fast food industry has received from the Department of Health & Human Services and the waves of burger bashing we've all seen in the press. And, did I mention, they have a CEO who had a heart attack this morning and died?

Dwayne called this evening. I had to cut our conversation short because I had hamburgers burning on the grill.


I ate two of them.

That completely eliminated the fish burps.

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