Saturday, August 21, 2004

Upward Trend

August 19 Status Report:

Wife: Supremely stressed and overworked.
Kid #1: Emotionally fragile.
Kid #2: Covered in hives.
Cat: Neglected and confused.
Plants: Neglected and confused.
Website: Neglected and confused.

August 21 Status Report:

Wife: Situation improving.
Kid #1: Emtionally stable (happy?).
Kid #2: Clear skinned and bubbly.
Cat: Petted. Fed.
Plants: Neglected and confused.
Website: FINALLY! All new photos of the girls and a new movie called "Water Balloons" in the multimedia section. It's a big file, but worth the wait. Just head over to the gallery and use your password. No password? Just send me an email.

Sunday, August 08, 2004

Hello Muddah. Hello Faddah.

Here I am at . . .

Camp Allie?

Yes, beautiful Camp Allie. A place where a human can come to free him or herself of the suffocating layers of stress and anxiety that build up after toiling each day in our synthetic, pre-packaged, homogenized world.

In other words, we bought a tent and put it up in the backyard.

Allie, her mother and I gathered everything we'd need to survive. Here's Allie's list:

Ranger Debbie delivered most of supplies including ice cream with chocolate sauce (an essential element of any successful wilderness exploration; ask Lewis and Clark).

I honestly didn't think Allie would make it through the night. However, after we collected every blanket in the house and piled them on top of the inflatable pool lounges Debbie bought for us, sleeping in the tent wasn't too far a departure from her bed.

It was cold. In the morning I diagnosed myself with arthritis in a few areas of my body that weren't under a comforter. Allie didn't have this problem and said she slept well.

Later in the day the whole family ate McDonald's in the tent. Then Allie and I napped in the tent until late in the afternoon.

Looking back, I'm proud of what we accomplished. The family pulled together so that Allie and I could gently caress the cheek of Mother Nature. No matter what the obstacle, we found a way to survive.

Has this experience changed me? Changed Allie? Yes. Yes, indeed. In ways that are too profound to express with words. So please indulge me as I try to capture the essence of our encounter with nature in song. Simply click here.

Thursday, August 05, 2004

Most of you Were There. . .

Julia didn't eat her cake. She looked at it and cried. I tried stuffing a piece of it in her mouth and she resisted. That made her cry more.

I'm not sure if that was before or after the police arrived.

Nobody went to jail. There were no official reprimands or even stern looks. Claudette waved to the officer in order to invite him to a naked water balloon fight. He saw her and stopped to investigate.

There was a cat in a pet carrier in the back seat of the squad car. The officer was looking for the owner. The cat was wearing rabies tags so I'm sure they'll find the owner. But the animal does have a record now and that's never a good thing for any one.

We did invite the officer to the naked water balloon fight. He said we should wait until after dark.

We didn't wait until after dark and there was no nudity. Although after being soaked by several water balloons my shirt was clinging to my body in a very sensual way. I noticed one of our neighbors gazing at me from his bedroom window. I felt like a piece of meat but in a good way.

No one reported symptoms of food poisoning. It's been about a week since the party so I'm pretty sure we're in the clear.

So we've kept Julia alive for an entire year. Even with her enormous head. Dr. Tom says her head is bigger than 95% of other babies her age. We didn't notice. It hasn't been an issue. Although I do notice that sometimes when I pull a T-Shirt over her head it can be a bit of a struggle.