Thursday, October 07, 2004

Expressed Gland Zone of Missed Birthdays Walking

I'm sure it isn't the most pleasant experience to have your ass juiced like a ripe orange. However, the vet told me it was a good thing Pig got squeezed. The doc said our cat's anal glands were chock full of noxious fluid and could have blown at any moment. Funny thing was the Dr. had a different attitude when I first requested that Pig get a good butt milking. The vet gave me a puzzled look and kind of shrugged when I asked her to do it. But I know our cat, I know our cat's rear and when it's ready to be pumped out.

I don't even want to think about the Google hits I'm going to get from the above paragaph.

Let's move on. . .

I have now established a four foot Zone of Death around this computer's keyboard. Anyone venturing within this newly establish zone with beverages, sloppy food, mucous, a large carbuncle or anything that could potentially gum-up this keyboard will face serious consequences. I usually enjoy an ice cold bottle of water or a fruit punch flavored Gatorade while I'm down here typing. Those days are over now that I have to remove what looks to be Pepsi from between the B, N and M keys. I don't drink a lot of brown, sticky beverages (I just told you what I drink while typing). So I'm taking my name off the list of suspects and have hired an outside agency to do a more thorough investigation.

In other news:

On October 5 I tried to remember Michelle's work number. I tried call Michelle that same evening but she wasn't home. I didn't get in touch with my sister on her birthday. Bad brother. I love my sister. So when I spoke to her this morning I let her know how bad I felt. She didn't even get a cake on her birthday. That made me feel even worse. I will bake a cake and mail it to her. I'm sure the icing will get a little screwed-up, but at least she'll have a cake.

Changing topics:

Allie stood out on the deck last night and sobbed. I went outside to see what the problem was. She was crying because the sun was going down and it was so beautiful. She didn't want the sun to go away. I suppose I should be encouraged that she is moved to tears over the beauty of a sunset. But at the time I was just trying to figure out which day would be the best to take Allie to her soon-to-be-arranged therapy appointments. But she doesn't need therapy. She needs another beautiful sunset to reassure her Dad wasn't lying when he scooped her up and swore that she has many more beautiful sunsets in her future.

One last thing:

Julia is walking. She stands all by herself, then takes a few steps, then plops down on her butt. She also started giving kisses. It works like this: you ask her for a kiss, then she opens her slobber filled mouth and presses it against your lips. Then she pats you on the head.

I'm more thrilled about the walking thing.

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