Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Two - Two Posts in One

Driving home from Chicago last weekend was tough on the kids. Allie's quote summed it up, "I love the big buildings but I hate all of the traffic."

At one point Julia started flipping out (again). I didn't know what to do. I had exhausted our entire arsenal of snacks, toys and distractions. Finally I reached into the bottom of Julia's diaper bag and pulled out a single, white Lego and handed it to her.

She looked at me and said with her eyes, "Are you serious? I've been crying and moaning as if I'm trying to pass a McNugget-sized kidney stone and you think this is going to shut me up? Surely there is more to follow."

She examined the Lego. She searched for someway to activate it. Each time she turned it over she looked back to me for some clue as to how it worked. Then Deb suggested that I give her a snack-sized baggie to put the Lego in. I gave Julia the baggie. She put the Lego inside. She took it out again.

She was occupied. She was quiet.

At this point in the trip Deb and I were fairly punchy so we began to laugh uncontrollably. We started to list all the other "toys" that were waiting for Julia when she got home. The list included dead batteries, dryer lint and sticks.

New topic. Same post.

I can't stop thinking about Marmite. The stuff is yeast extract that British people typically spread on buttered toast. I guess the Australian equivalent is Vegemite and we've all heard that song.

I tasted the stuff when we were in England. It's repulsive. If you've been on the Miller Brewing tour in Milwaukee you know the smell. I like that smell. Only Marmite is that smell greatly magnified then reduced down to a sticky paste that has enough salt added to kill a slug without actually touching it.

I want more.

I want to get a small jar of the stuff and see if it's really as bad as my memory tells me it is. I want to try it on toast. Maybe then I'll understand why people continue to buy it. The problem is I can't find it. I know I can order the stuff, but I don't want to spend $20 only to take one bite of toast and say, "Yeah. It really is as bad as I remember. I'll save it for company." Then it'll sit on the shelf year-after-year until I find some unsuspecting victims.

What I would like to buy is a jar of pickles. I ate a pickle and cheese sandwich at Wimbledon and liked it. The pickle portion of the sandwich was more like a saucy relish. It was good. Maybe I'll get some of that.

I'll let you know.

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